Sidney's POV

'What the hell is going on with her?' I thought driving away from her house not knowing where I was going. She's up and down and all over the place. One minute we are connecting on a level far deeper than I ever expected, and the next we can only be friends? There's no way she can really mean that! I was not imagining the chemistry between us or the way she makes me feel. I know she feels it too, I can see it in her eyes. So why is she fighting so hard against it? Think about it stupid! She's scared! And she has every right to be. I was right in thinking that she'd been hurt badly, but I had never imagined that it would have been anything like what she had just described to me. The abuse she endured from that monster was something I couldn't wrap my brain around. How could a man lay his hands on that beautiful creature? Any man that could do that is clearly not a man, he is a coward. Because of him, she's built this wall around herself. She's afraid to trust anyone and I'm not sure I can really blame her for that.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Why does this have to be so fucking difficult? I just want to take her in my arms and tell her everything will be ok. Show her that all men are not the same, assure her that I would never hurt her. After today I feel so close to her, my feelings deepening with every word she spoke. How am I supposed to be friends with the girl I am quite possibly falling in love with? LOVE? Shit Crosby are you serious? I'm so confused. Am I falling in love with her or is it the challenge? This is not a simple case of her playing hard to get, she may be impossible to get. Is she worth all the aggravation and frustration I am going to encounter if I try to pursue a relationship with her? YES! I still believe that if we spend time together she will have to give in to the feelings between us and she will fall in love with me. But can I handle being around her under the disguise of her friend when I feel the way I do? I'm going to have to try because I may not be sure about alot of things, but the one thing I am sure of is I need Bekah in my life. This is going to be a tricky situation. I need to get close to her without going to far. Man, I wish I could talk to my Dad about this. Just then I realized I had arrived at my destination. I was back at the hospital. I guess this is the next best thing. I just hope he will understand and not criticize what I need to do.