I have just survived the most horrific, demeaning staff appreciation week that was ever thought of! (I'll spare you the details!) Humiliation is not exactly my idea of showing your staff that you appreciate them but hey; that's just me! It did get me to thinking about how I would like to be shown that I'm appreciated and I came to the conclusion that even a simple 'thank you' goes a long way. So that's what I decided to do for everyone in my life, including you - my wonderful, undertanding and faithful readers! So let me just say THANK YOU! You have all been amazingly patient waiting for updates, supportive of this little story I started a year ago just for kicks and giggles, and wonderfully forthcoming with your comments. I find myself hopelessly addicted to reading your comments and all of your stories as well. It's kind of bizare really, but even though I have never met or even talked to any of you personally, it kinda feels like were are a close knit 'family' connected by our love of the fan fics. So 'family', I say thank you to you. Thank you for reading my story; thank you for leaving your comments and thank you for entertaining me with the blood, sweat and tears that I'm sure you put in to writing your stories. You are appreciated!
~B~
PS... It is a personal goal to reach at least 50 followers of my story and thanks to you all, I'm just about there! So if you like my story, pass it on to all you friends that you think would enjoy it as well and tell them to follow it too! (The more the merrier - maybe I'll make 100!) Cheers eh!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Chapter 87
"Hey bijou, do you wanna grab some lunch today?"
"Today isn't great for me Max, I have alot to do."
"Can you squeeze me in? I need to talk to you about something."
"That can't be good. What's up?"
"I'd rather tell you in person."
"Okay, now you're really scaring me."
"It's not bad, I promise."
"Fine, but I can't be long."
"I'll pick you up in twenty!"
"See you then."
My mind was racing as I flew around the house trying to get ready. That was one thing about Max; he was very unpredictable and spontaneous. If he got an idea in his head it was now or never. I couldn't imagine what he needed to tell me. I knew he had lunch with Marc and Sid the other day, which really surprised me, but I had been so busy with work and the boys hockey I hadn't had a chance to talk to Sid. Right on cue, the doorbell rang.
"Belle! Vous êtes absolument magnifique bijou," he said kiss both my cheeks.
"And you're up to something," I replied closing and locking my front door.
"It would just kill you to accept a compliment graciously wouldn't it?"
"You're right; I apologize. Merci Max. You are looking quite handsome yourself."
"Thank you. See, it's not that hard."
"Okay, I get it! You know I'm not good with compliments so why are you always giving me such a hard time about it. Better yet, just stop giving them; problem solved!"
"Never! I figure the same is true about good things as it is with bad things. If you hear them enough you'll start to believe them."
I smiled warmly at this amazing man who had quickly become one of my best friends.
"It's easier to believe the bad stuff," I said quietly. "Where are we going anyways?"
"Our place."
Not long after we arrived at 'our place' and were greeted by Mrs. P in the same cheek pinching manner that took place the first time Max brought me here and every time since.
"Maxime, you not come for long time."
"Sorry Mrs. P. I've been really busy."
"Busy. Pssh. Not to busy to eat. Everyone have to eat. Look at you; so skinny. Need to eat more if you going to be tough guy."
I laughed and the old woman's comments.
"She's right Max, you are a little scrawny."
"This good girl Maxime. Smart girl. I like, I like very much. You good for him dear," she said patting my cheek. "You be fool if this one gets away boy."
Mrs. P shook her head all the way back to our table mumbling in Italian. I kind of chuckled at the old woman's comments.
"She still doesn't get that we're not together does she?" I asked.
"She's stubborn. Only believes what she wants to believe."
"You never told her otherwise did you?"
"Of course I did! The first time we were here. You were right there don't you remember?"
"You're right; I do remember. Maybe it's because I'm the only girl you've ever brought here more than once."
"Harsh!"
"True!"
"You're right. But you have to admit; this is a great set up I have going here to impress the ladies."
"You are horrible Maxime!"
"Uh oh; my whole name. Now I'm in trouble!"
"Ya know, sometimes with the way you talk and think about women, I can't even believe we're friends. It's disgusting the way you use them."
"Lighten up bijou. I'm having fun, no harm in that."
"I am not going to have this conversation with you...again! Can we please talk about something...anything else?"
Mrs. P returned with our lunch, which we never even ordered by the way, and a bottle of wine. She said something in Italian to Max and disappeared again.
"We didn't order yet. What if I didn't want...chicken parmesan? And what did she say to you?"
"She said all good girls; the marrying, kind eat chicken parmesan."
"Excuse me?"
"And that you needed to put some meat on your bones if you're going to have babies," he said trying not to break out into hysterics.
"Great! Not only does she have us married off, but now I'm having babies too? How many four?"
"Eight actually," Max laughed not being able to conceal it any longer.
"I'm glad you think this is so funny. When are you going to set the poor woman straight?"
"Ah come on Beks, it's harmless. Besides, it makes her happy to think I found someone to take care of me."
"Then she doesn't know you very well at all," I said taking a bite of my chicken. "Oh my god, this is amazing!" I closed my eyes so I could savour every bit of this piece of heaven.
"Good non? Mr. P once told me that she made this for him on their first date, and after eating it, he knew he was going to marry her."
"Oh please! That kind of thing doesn't happen in real life."
"You are very cynical Ms. Jones. And it's true. They were married only six weeks later. That was almost forty years ago."
"Seriously?"
"I can not lie."
"That is so sweet. And they're still in love after all these years," I said looking towards the old couple behind the bar.
"See, I knew you had some romantic in you. Speaking of which, that's what I wanted to talk to you about."
"Romance?" I asked very confused.
"Sort of. Have you talked to Sid since we had lunch the other day?"
"No."
"Good, so I'll be the first to tell you."
"Tell me what?"
"Me and golden boy are cool. We talked everything out. I told him what was pissing me off about him and we talked through it. We can now officially coexist in your life with no bloodshed. Are you proud?"
"Is this for real?"
"Totally."
"No more 'golden boy' snotty comments from you and no more rolling eyes when I say I'm going out with you from him?"
"Nope, none of that. We are officially friends again. I still don't think he's good enough for you but..."
"Max!"
"I'm just kidding. But I did tell him one very serious thing."
"What's that?"
"That you are very important to me, and if he hurts you or disrespects you in any way, or breaks your heart, I will kill him."
"Max, you did not threaten him?"
"Yes I did and I meant every word."
"Well, I think that was a tad harsh, but thank you for trying to protect me."
"I would do anything for you bijou. I love you."
"I love you too Maxie."
"And there's more."
"I don't know if I can handle any more good news."
"I hope it's good news." He took a deep breath before continuing. "I met someone."
"Who?" I asked finishing off my chicken.
"Her name is Brittney and Beks, she's amazing!"
'Her? He met a her?' A knot began to form in the pit of my stomach. I had no words, and when I didn't respond, Max kept talking.
"She's beautiful and smart and funny and sweet and she had no idea who I was. She has no clue about hockey or the Pens or any of that stuff."
'Great! I hate her already!' I thought.
"Wow! Umm... wow! That's alot of information to take in."
"I know! I'm just so excited about her Beks, I couldn't wait to tell you any longer."
"Any longer? How long have you known her?" I asked as that knot began to get bigger and my heart sank a little lower.
"About a month. We've been out like six times now."
"Six? As in out out? Not you've slept with her six times?"
"That's the craziest part! I haven't slept with her yet!"
'OH-MY-GOD! Is he serious? What the hell!'
"There's something different about Britt. When I met her, I didn't think 'wow, I want to fuck her' it was like 'wow, she's beautiful. I wonder what she'd like to do on a date?'"
"Wow, that was a little graphic, but thanks."
"My point is, sleeping with her was not the first thing I thought about when I met her and I'm really freaked out about that."
"Wow."
"Do you think you could maybe say something else here Beks, something a little more helpful?"
'Like what? What the hell are you thinking? You don't date girls, you sleep with them and throw them away. No, I want you for myself. Wait...what?'
"Where did you meet her?"
"At a restaurant downtown where she works."
"She works in a restaurant?"
"Yeah, she's a waitress."
"Does she do anything else like go to school?"
"Not right now. She wants to go to Pitt but she's working for tuition right now."
"And she had no idea that you played for the Pens?"
"Nope, none. Says she not much of a sports fan."
'Like I fucking believe that one!'
"Beks, she's great. I think you'll really like her."
'Hmm, doubt it!'
"Yeah Max. I'm sure if you like her I will too."
'That the politically correct friend like thing to say right?'
"Beks, I really like this girl, but you are one of my best friends and your opinion is really important to me. That's why I want you to meet her...like tomorrow."
"Today isn't great for me Max, I have alot to do."
"Can you squeeze me in? I need to talk to you about something."
"That can't be good. What's up?"
"I'd rather tell you in person."
"Okay, now you're really scaring me."
"It's not bad, I promise."
"Fine, but I can't be long."
"I'll pick you up in twenty!"
"See you then."
My mind was racing as I flew around the house trying to get ready. That was one thing about Max; he was very unpredictable and spontaneous. If he got an idea in his head it was now or never. I couldn't imagine what he needed to tell me. I knew he had lunch with Marc and Sid the other day, which really surprised me, but I had been so busy with work and the boys hockey I hadn't had a chance to talk to Sid. Right on cue, the doorbell rang.
"Belle! Vous êtes absolument magnifique bijou," he said kiss both my cheeks.
"And you're up to something," I replied closing and locking my front door.
"It would just kill you to accept a compliment graciously wouldn't it?"
"You're right; I apologize. Merci Max. You are looking quite handsome yourself."
"Thank you. See, it's not that hard."
"Okay, I get it! You know I'm not good with compliments so why are you always giving me such a hard time about it. Better yet, just stop giving them; problem solved!"
"Never! I figure the same is true about good things as it is with bad things. If you hear them enough you'll start to believe them."
I smiled warmly at this amazing man who had quickly become one of my best friends.
"It's easier to believe the bad stuff," I said quietly. "Where are we going anyways?"
"Our place."
Not long after we arrived at 'our place' and were greeted by Mrs. P in the same cheek pinching manner that took place the first time Max brought me here and every time since.
"Maxime, you not come for long time."
"Sorry Mrs. P. I've been really busy."
"Busy. Pssh. Not to busy to eat. Everyone have to eat. Look at you; so skinny. Need to eat more if you going to be tough guy."
I laughed and the old woman's comments.
"She's right Max, you are a little scrawny."
"This good girl Maxime. Smart girl. I like, I like very much. You good for him dear," she said patting my cheek. "You be fool if this one gets away boy."
Mrs. P shook her head all the way back to our table mumbling in Italian. I kind of chuckled at the old woman's comments.
"She still doesn't get that we're not together does she?" I asked.
"She's stubborn. Only believes what she wants to believe."
"You never told her otherwise did you?"
"Of course I did! The first time we were here. You were right there don't you remember?"
"You're right; I do remember. Maybe it's because I'm the only girl you've ever brought here more than once."
"Harsh!"
"True!"
"You're right. But you have to admit; this is a great set up I have going here to impress the ladies."
"You are horrible Maxime!"
"Uh oh; my whole name. Now I'm in trouble!"
"Ya know, sometimes with the way you talk and think about women, I can't even believe we're friends. It's disgusting the way you use them."
"Lighten up bijou. I'm having fun, no harm in that."
"I am not going to have this conversation with you...again! Can we please talk about something...anything else?"
Mrs. P returned with our lunch, which we never even ordered by the way, and a bottle of wine. She said something in Italian to Max and disappeared again.
"We didn't order yet. What if I didn't want...chicken parmesan? And what did she say to you?"
"She said all good girls; the marrying, kind eat chicken parmesan."
"Excuse me?"
"And that you needed to put some meat on your bones if you're going to have babies," he said trying not to break out into hysterics.
"Great! Not only does she have us married off, but now I'm having babies too? How many four?"
"Eight actually," Max laughed not being able to conceal it any longer.
"I'm glad you think this is so funny. When are you going to set the poor woman straight?"
"Ah come on Beks, it's harmless. Besides, it makes her happy to think I found someone to take care of me."
"Then she doesn't know you very well at all," I said taking a bite of my chicken. "Oh my god, this is amazing!" I closed my eyes so I could savour every bit of this piece of heaven.
"Good non? Mr. P once told me that she made this for him on their first date, and after eating it, he knew he was going to marry her."
"Oh please! That kind of thing doesn't happen in real life."
"You are very cynical Ms. Jones. And it's true. They were married only six weeks later. That was almost forty years ago."
"Seriously?"
"I can not lie."
"That is so sweet. And they're still in love after all these years," I said looking towards the old couple behind the bar.
"See, I knew you had some romantic in you. Speaking of which, that's what I wanted to talk to you about."
"Romance?" I asked very confused.
"Sort of. Have you talked to Sid since we had lunch the other day?"
"No."
"Good, so I'll be the first to tell you."
"Tell me what?"
"Me and golden boy are cool. We talked everything out. I told him what was pissing me off about him and we talked through it. We can now officially coexist in your life with no bloodshed. Are you proud?"
"Is this for real?"
"Totally."
"No more 'golden boy' snotty comments from you and no more rolling eyes when I say I'm going out with you from him?"
"Nope, none of that. We are officially friends again. I still don't think he's good enough for you but..."
"Max!"
"I'm just kidding. But I did tell him one very serious thing."
"What's that?"
"That you are very important to me, and if he hurts you or disrespects you in any way, or breaks your heart, I will kill him."
"Max, you did not threaten him?"
"Yes I did and I meant every word."
"Well, I think that was a tad harsh, but thank you for trying to protect me."
"I would do anything for you bijou. I love you."
"I love you too Maxie."
"And there's more."
"I don't know if I can handle any more good news."
"I hope it's good news." He took a deep breath before continuing. "I met someone."
"Who?" I asked finishing off my chicken.
"Her name is Brittney and Beks, she's amazing!"
'Her? He met a her?' A knot began to form in the pit of my stomach. I had no words, and when I didn't respond, Max kept talking.
"She's beautiful and smart and funny and sweet and she had no idea who I was. She has no clue about hockey or the Pens or any of that stuff."
'Great! I hate her already!' I thought.
"Wow! Umm... wow! That's alot of information to take in."
"I know! I'm just so excited about her Beks, I couldn't wait to tell you any longer."
"Any longer? How long have you known her?" I asked as that knot began to get bigger and my heart sank a little lower.
"About a month. We've been out like six times now."
"Six? As in out out? Not you've slept with her six times?"
"That's the craziest part! I haven't slept with her yet!"
'OH-MY-GOD! Is he serious? What the hell!'
"There's something different about Britt. When I met her, I didn't think 'wow, I want to fuck her' it was like 'wow, she's beautiful. I wonder what she'd like to do on a date?'"
"Wow, that was a little graphic, but thanks."
"My point is, sleeping with her was not the first thing I thought about when I met her and I'm really freaked out about that."
"Wow."
"Do you think you could maybe say something else here Beks, something a little more helpful?"
'Like what? What the hell are you thinking? You don't date girls, you sleep with them and throw them away. No, I want you for myself. Wait...what?'
"Where did you meet her?"
"At a restaurant downtown where she works."
"She works in a restaurant?"
"Yeah, she's a waitress."
"Does she do anything else like go to school?"
"Not right now. She wants to go to Pitt but she's working for tuition right now."
"And she had no idea that you played for the Pens?"
"Nope, none. Says she not much of a sports fan."
'Like I fucking believe that one!'
"Beks, she's great. I think you'll really like her."
'Hmm, doubt it!'
"Yeah Max. I'm sure if you like her I will too."
'That the politically correct friend like thing to say right?'
"Beks, I really like this girl, but you are one of my best friends and your opinion is really important to me. That's why I want you to meet her...like tomorrow."
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
I am in mourning...
To my faithful readers:
Thank you for indulging me in my thoughts and sometimes rants that have nothing to do with my story.
I am having a hard time finding any joy today. We finally laid Michael Jackson to rest today. Say what you want about him; think about all the crazy things that may or may not have been true about him; but one thing remains certain. The man was a legend and an amazing human being who loved people more than he loved himself. He gave so much to the world and it was and will be a better place for him having lived. Rest in peace MJ.
And equally devastating to me today; MY Joe, Burnaby Joe, Super Joe, otherwise known as Joe Sakic, has decided to break my heart and hang up his skates. Joe was, no rephrase that, IS an amazing hockey player and an even more amazing human being. I have been priveledged enough to get to know Joe some over the years and can be confident in saying he is one of the finest human beings ever to be put on this planet. He is a quiet, confident and strong leader who lead by example. He was strong in work ethic and personal values and expected nothing less from the people around him. He didn't just expect it; he demanded it in the gentle, quiet Joe way that he had. Joe is the definition of class. He gives tirelessly and unselfishly to countless charities to better the city that he called home. While this is not a true death, to me, it is the death of hockey in the great city of Denver. I had hoped this would not have happened for another year, but with all the recent happenings in the franchise, I knew this day would be coming and I don't think any true fan could blame you Joe. I wouldn't want my good name attatched to a franchise that in a few short years has gone frome greatness to dispair. So with a sad, broken and heavy heart, I say farewell Super Joe! Thank you for everything you brought to this game I love so much. The vision of you skating flawlessly and effortlessly will be engraved in my memory forever. The sight of you lifting Lord Stanley's cup will always be one of my happiest memories. You are loved and you will be greatly missed. Happy birthday my friend!
~B~
Thank you for indulging me in my thoughts and sometimes rants that have nothing to do with my story.
I am having a hard time finding any joy today. We finally laid Michael Jackson to rest today. Say what you want about him; think about all the crazy things that may or may not have been true about him; but one thing remains certain. The man was a legend and an amazing human being who loved people more than he loved himself. He gave so much to the world and it was and will be a better place for him having lived. Rest in peace MJ.
And equally devastating to me today; MY Joe, Burnaby Joe, Super Joe, otherwise known as Joe Sakic, has decided to break my heart and hang up his skates. Joe was, no rephrase that, IS an amazing hockey player and an even more amazing human being. I have been priveledged enough to get to know Joe some over the years and can be confident in saying he is one of the finest human beings ever to be put on this planet. He is a quiet, confident and strong leader who lead by example. He was strong in work ethic and personal values and expected nothing less from the people around him. He didn't just expect it; he demanded it in the gentle, quiet Joe way that he had. Joe is the definition of class. He gives tirelessly and unselfishly to countless charities to better the city that he called home. While this is not a true death, to me, it is the death of hockey in the great city of Denver. I had hoped this would not have happened for another year, but with all the recent happenings in the franchise, I knew this day would be coming and I don't think any true fan could blame you Joe. I wouldn't want my good name attatched to a franchise that in a few short years has gone frome greatness to dispair. So with a sad, broken and heavy heart, I say farewell Super Joe! Thank you for everything you brought to this game I love so much. The vision of you skating flawlessly and effortlessly will be engraved in my memory forever. The sight of you lifting Lord Stanley's cup will always be one of my happiest memories. You are loved and you will be greatly missed. Happy birthday my friend!
~B~
Sidney's POV
"Earth to Sid...hello?"
No reply.
"Oh my god Sid, there are three girls outside the window and they are totally flashing their tits at us!"
Still nothing.
Max and Flower looked at each other and nodded in agreement. They both knew what needed to be done. At the same time they both raised their arms and punched their friend in the arm at the same time.
"Ouch! What the fuck?"
"It's about time something snapped you out of it! We've been talking to you for the last ten minutes. Where the hell were you just now?"
"I've been sitting here assholes," I said still rubbing my tender arms.
"You may be sitting here physically, but your mind is on another planet mon ami."
"I don't think we need to guess what or rather who you were thinking about," Max added.
I couldn't keep the smile off my face. "I can't help it you guys, Bekah is...she's just so...(deep sigh) amazing! I am so in love with her; I can't even describe it."
"Then don't!" Max said. "Please spare us the disgusting mushy love stuff. Grow some balls man, you sound like a fucking girl!"
"Shut the fuck up Talbot!"
"Boys, boys come on now," Flower interrupted. "I thought we were past all this crap. Can't you get along long enough for us to have a nice, peaceful lunch?"
"Sorry Flower," I muttered looking down at my water glass.
"Yeah me to. Sorry man."
"You guys are worse than a couple of kids. Do you think you can get along long enough for me to go to the bathroom and call Vero, or do I have to take one of you with me?"
"Eeww gross, dude! We're not girls, we do NOT go to the bathroom together!"
"We'll be fine Flower," I added.
Max and I sat in awkward silence for a few minutes before I decided that enough was enough. This thing between me and Max had to stop.
"What's your problem with me Talbot?"
He just laughed.
"I'm serious. We were great friends not that long ago playing at the juniors; what the hell happened? What did I do to piss you off so much?"
"You really don't get it do you?"
"Obviously not, otherwise I wouldn't be asking."
"I'm sorry if this hurts your feelings Sid, but I can't say it any other way. I am so sick and fucking tired of all the hype around you. I'm sick of hearing you're the next 'great one'; I'm sick of hearing that you're the face of the NHL; I'm sick of hearing your going to be the one who saves this league; I'm sick of the fact that we constantly have to rearrange our plan because we get delayed with the three ring circus that follows you around all the time, sometimes I just want to get on the fucking bus and go, but oh no, we have to wait for golden boy to quit signing autographs, or we have to go around the block and pick you up because you couldn't get out the door like a normal person; I'm sick of seeing your ugly mug in every newspaper, magazine, sports show, web site and billboard, you name it there's your face! I'm sick of this goody two shoes act you put on for everyone; I'm sick of you thinking you're entitled to everything in the world and I'm sure as shit sick of you getting anything and everything you want and that includes Bekah. You don't deserve her. You're not good enough for her."
I sat there not really knowing what to say. I mean, I knew Max had a problem with me, but I thought it was because I was with Bekah and he wasn't. I had no idea he had so much pent up anger towards me.
"I know," I said barely above a whisper.
"Excuse me?" Max said questioningly.
I looked him in the eye as I said "You're right. I know I don't deserve her. She is too good for a guy like me. I have no idea what she sees in me, but I thank God everyday that she loves me. She makes me better Max, not only as a hockey player, but as a person. I want to be better so I won't let her down; so I can be someone worthy of her love. As for the rest of the stuff, I don't lie and I don't intend to start now, so you can believe when I say I'm sick of me too. I would give anything to be like the rest of you. If I could make the circus leave town I would do it in a heartbeat, but I can't. For whatever reason I was chosen to carry this burden and I'm not going to apologize for it. I honestly don't think that I'm entitled to anything I don't work my ass off for. You know as well as I do that we have to have almost another personality when were dealing with the media, you don't let them see everything in your personal life or even what your entire personality is, and I'm no different. Does it suck? Hell yeah! I have an amazing girlfriend that I can't even tell anyone about just so the press and the fans don't rip her entire life apart. I don't know what else I can say to you to make things okay with us except that I am the same guy you've been playing against for the last three years and I'm the same guy that followed those girls around the city for two hours when we were at juniors. I haven't changed. I love my family and my friends and my girlfriend and I do anything for any one of them and that's the truth. Bekah said we need to find a way to co-exist in her life and I really hope we can do that, not only for her but for us as well."
Max was smirking when he said "I forgot about those girls! They led us on quite a wild goose chase!"
"Yeah, we almost got suspended for breaking curfew."
"That was awesome!"
"I'll never forget it. Not because of the girls or anything like that, but because that was something I did that made me feel like a normal kid and I got to do it with one of my best friends. I'm sorry you feel the way you do about me Max; if I could change it, I would."
He was quiet for a minute. "You just did."
"O kaaaaay," I said skeptically.
"This shit is behind us now, for Bekah and for us, but you need to know one thing."
"What's that?" I asked.
"If you do anything to hurt her; if you disrespect her in anyway; if you break her heart, I will kill you myself. Got it?"
"Loud and clear."
No reply.
"Oh my god Sid, there are three girls outside the window and they are totally flashing their tits at us!"
Still nothing.
Max and Flower looked at each other and nodded in agreement. They both knew what needed to be done. At the same time they both raised their arms and punched their friend in the arm at the same time.
"Ouch! What the fuck?"
"It's about time something snapped you out of it! We've been talking to you for the last ten minutes. Where the hell were you just now?"
"I've been sitting here assholes," I said still rubbing my tender arms.
"You may be sitting here physically, but your mind is on another planet mon ami."
"I don't think we need to guess what or rather who you were thinking about," Max added.
I couldn't keep the smile off my face. "I can't help it you guys, Bekah is...she's just so...(deep sigh) amazing! I am so in love with her; I can't even describe it."
"Then don't!" Max said. "Please spare us the disgusting mushy love stuff. Grow some balls man, you sound like a fucking girl!"
"Shut the fuck up Talbot!"
"Boys, boys come on now," Flower interrupted. "I thought we were past all this crap. Can't you get along long enough for us to have a nice, peaceful lunch?"
"Sorry Flower," I muttered looking down at my water glass.
"Yeah me to. Sorry man."
"You guys are worse than a couple of kids. Do you think you can get along long enough for me to go to the bathroom and call Vero, or do I have to take one of you with me?"
"Eeww gross, dude! We're not girls, we do NOT go to the bathroom together!"
"We'll be fine Flower," I added.
Max and I sat in awkward silence for a few minutes before I decided that enough was enough. This thing between me and Max had to stop.
"What's your problem with me Talbot?"
He just laughed.
"I'm serious. We were great friends not that long ago playing at the juniors; what the hell happened? What did I do to piss you off so much?"
"You really don't get it do you?"
"Obviously not, otherwise I wouldn't be asking."
"I'm sorry if this hurts your feelings Sid, but I can't say it any other way. I am so sick and fucking tired of all the hype around you. I'm sick of hearing you're the next 'great one'; I'm sick of hearing that you're the face of the NHL; I'm sick of hearing your going to be the one who saves this league; I'm sick of the fact that we constantly have to rearrange our plan because we get delayed with the three ring circus that follows you around all the time, sometimes I just want to get on the fucking bus and go, but oh no, we have to wait for golden boy to quit signing autographs, or we have to go around the block and pick you up because you couldn't get out the door like a normal person; I'm sick of seeing your ugly mug in every newspaper, magazine, sports show, web site and billboard, you name it there's your face! I'm sick of this goody two shoes act you put on for everyone; I'm sick of you thinking you're entitled to everything in the world and I'm sure as shit sick of you getting anything and everything you want and that includes Bekah. You don't deserve her. You're not good enough for her."
I sat there not really knowing what to say. I mean, I knew Max had a problem with me, but I thought it was because I was with Bekah and he wasn't. I had no idea he had so much pent up anger towards me.
"I know," I said barely above a whisper.
"Excuse me?" Max said questioningly.
I looked him in the eye as I said "You're right. I know I don't deserve her. She is too good for a guy like me. I have no idea what she sees in me, but I thank God everyday that she loves me. She makes me better Max, not only as a hockey player, but as a person. I want to be better so I won't let her down; so I can be someone worthy of her love. As for the rest of the stuff, I don't lie and I don't intend to start now, so you can believe when I say I'm sick of me too. I would give anything to be like the rest of you. If I could make the circus leave town I would do it in a heartbeat, but I can't. For whatever reason I was chosen to carry this burden and I'm not going to apologize for it. I honestly don't think that I'm entitled to anything I don't work my ass off for. You know as well as I do that we have to have almost another personality when were dealing with the media, you don't let them see everything in your personal life or even what your entire personality is, and I'm no different. Does it suck? Hell yeah! I have an amazing girlfriend that I can't even tell anyone about just so the press and the fans don't rip her entire life apart. I don't know what else I can say to you to make things okay with us except that I am the same guy you've been playing against for the last three years and I'm the same guy that followed those girls around the city for two hours when we were at juniors. I haven't changed. I love my family and my friends and my girlfriend and I do anything for any one of them and that's the truth. Bekah said we need to find a way to co-exist in her life and I really hope we can do that, not only for her but for us as well."
Max was smirking when he said "I forgot about those girls! They led us on quite a wild goose chase!"
"Yeah, we almost got suspended for breaking curfew."
"That was awesome!"
"I'll never forget it. Not because of the girls or anything like that, but because that was something I did that made me feel like a normal kid and I got to do it with one of my best friends. I'm sorry you feel the way you do about me Max; if I could change it, I would."
He was quiet for a minute. "You just did."
"O kaaaaay," I said skeptically.
"This shit is behind us now, for Bekah and for us, but you need to know one thing."
"What's that?" I asked.
"If you do anything to hurt her; if you disrespect her in anyway; if you break her heart, I will kill you myself. Got it?"
"Loud and clear."
Thursday, June 18, 2009
We are the Champions!
It almost makes you want to break out into song doesn't it! The Pens are Stanley Cup Champions! I am so proud of our guys and am not ashamed to admit that I cried a few tears of joy as Sidney raised the cup. It's so good to see a smile like that on his face again!
I find myself apologizing yet again for taking so long to update but as if I wasn't busy enough, I have now decided to further my education and complete my masters. What the hell am I thinking! I'm too old for this shit! Anyways... I hope you enjoy the update!
Cheers!
and P.S. Sorry about your luck Hossa!
I find myself apologizing yet again for taking so long to update but as if I wasn't busy enough, I have now decided to further my education and complete my masters. What the hell am I thinking! I'm too old for this shit! Anyways... I hope you enjoy the update!
Cheers!
and P.S. Sorry about your luck Hossa!
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Chapter 86
"Hey," he said as I opened the door for him.
"Hey," I said quietly.
God, he looked good. He was coming right from practice, but that's when I thought he looked the best. Dressed casually with his hat on and no product in his hair. Don't get me wrong; I love a man who looks good in a suit, but casual was totally working for him.
"I wasn't sure if you were working today, but I'm glad you're not. We really need to talk."
I nodded silently and led him to the kitchen counter.
"Do you want some coffee?" I asked.
"No thanks."
I poured myself a third cup and leaned against the counter opposite him. I searched his eyes for some clue as to what he was going to say. They were blank. The light that normally inhabited those beautiful caramel coloured eyes was not there. I took a deep breath and tried to prepare myself for the inevitable conversation I knew was going to take place. I had already played it a thousand times in my head...'sorry Bekah, I like you and everything but I just don't think that it's going to work out for us; the age difference is just too big to overcome. We are at two different places in our lives and I am not ready for the responsibility of kids, hell I'm still a kid myself with my whole life ahead of me. I think it's best if we end things now. It was great to get to know you but have a nice life.'
Yep, this conversation had been taking place in my head since he left the other night.
"Beks - Sid " we said at the same time.
"You go first," I told him.
"No, you should go first," he insisted.
"What happened the other night?" I asked barely above a whisper, "why did you just leave like that?"
"I...I'm not...I don't really..."
"Jesus Christ Sid!"
"I'm sorry...this is just really difficult for me to say."
"Just say it. I know what's coming Sid so just say it."
"Beks, you have no idea what I'm going to say."
"Yes I do so spit it out for crying out loud!" I yelled not being able to contain the anger that was building inside me any longer.
"Calm down," Sid said getting up off his stool and coming towards me.
"Please don't come any closer and please don't tell me to calm down. Say it...just say it," I said barely holding back tears now.
Sid took a few more steps before he stopped. He was close enough that I could smell him but too far away to touch me.
"Why are you so upset? What is it you think I'm going to say?"
The tears were flowing and so were the words out of my mouth.
"Just be a man and tell me the truth!"
"And what would that be?" he asked calmly.
"That it's over! You don't want to be with me anymore, does that about cover it?"
He broke out into that high pitched girly laugh he had. Was he out of his mind? How was this funny?"
"I'm glad you think this is humorous."
"Beks," he said between gasps, "where in the world did you come up with that?"
Now I was just pissed. "Oh, I don't know, maybe because one minute I'm having an amazing kiss with my boyfriend and the next minute he practically runs out the door and I don't hear from him for two days! Yeah, why would I think it was over?"
He came towards me again, this time not letting the evil glare I was giving him stop him. He put his hands on my arms and looked deep into my eyes. "Baby, I love you. You are completely insane, but I love you. Nothing could be further from the truth."
"You don't want to break up?" I asked now very confused.
"No, I don't want to break up! I have put waaaaaaaaaay too much work into you to let you go now!"
"If that's supposed to be funny, I'm not laughing," I said holding back a smile.
"Yeah it is, and you want to smile," he said poking me in the sides and making me flinch.
"Stop it!" I said pushing his hands away. "If you're not breaking up with me, then what did you come here to talk about? Why did you leave the other night?"
He took a deep breath and pulled me in close to him. He nuzzled his face into my neck and his hot breath sent shivers through my entire body.
"I was scared," he said making no attempt to lift his head.
"Scared? Of what? Me?"
"You? No, baby I could never be scared of you," he chuckled finally raising his head only to rest his forehead against mine.
"Then what were you scared of?"
"Of where we were headed."
"I don't understand."
"We were getting very...let's say passionate, the other night and I was scared of what it was going to lead to."
"Sex?" I asked finally cluing in.
"Well...yeah," he said rather sheepishly.
"Are you saying that you don't want to have sex with me?" I goaded.
"NO! God no! That's not what I'm saying at all! Bekah you are incredibly beautiful and sexy and you excite me more than you could ever imagine...it's just...we said we were going to take things slow and then we were getting so close and..." he stopped.
"And what?" I asked tenderly touching his cheek.
He kissed the tip of my nose and looked down at the floor before he said "and...I've never been with anyone before."
A smile crept across my face as I processed what he had just said. I lifted his chin with my fingers so I could look into those gorgeous eyes of his.
"You've never been with anyone? Ever?"
"No, never."
"Ever?"
"N-E-V-E-R!" he stressed. "I was afraid to tell you because I didn't want to freak you out. I know you're still coming to terms with the whole age thing and I didn't think this information would really help."
I looked at him and smiled before wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing those beautiful, plump lips.
"Sidney Patrick Crosby, I love you. I-love-you!" I said smiling into another kiss.
"I love you too Beks," he said squeezing me into a tight hug and lifting my feet off the ground.
"So how is it that Mr. Hockey has never had sex?" I said now poking him in the sides.
"I was focused on playing hockey and...well, I've never been in love until now and that's important to me. I don't want to sleep with someone just for the sake of having sex. When I have sex for the first time I want it to be amazing and special and that means being in love."
I kissed him softly at first and then slowly and deeply and when we finally broke apart, our foreheads were once again resting against each other's.
"You never cease to amaze me Sidney," I whispered. "You are perfect aren't you?"
"Hardly! I am no where near perfect, but you...you make me a better man," he said. And with that, our lips met once again; this time not breaking apart for a long...long time.
"So now that that's settled," I started once we were both sitting at the counter, "let's just put everything out on the table."
"Okay."
"Sid, I love you and I think it's safe to say that we are stir up feelings inside the each other?"
"I'd say that's true."
"But clearly neither of us are ready to take our relationship to that level yet. We agreed to take thing slow and I think we should stick to it."
"I agree."
"So the ground rules remain the same. No spending the night when the kids are here, and since they are not going to know about us right away, that shouldn't be a problem. And as for sex, it's just not an option right now. Aside from this new information, I am no where near ready to take that step, so no more disappearing acts okay?"
"Deal, but I have one condition to add."
"And what's that?"
"I get to kiss you as much and as often as I like."
"As long as it fits into all other previously discussed rules."
"You drive a hard bargain Miss Jones, but I believe I can agree to those terms."
"Good."
"And since we are clearly in no violation of said rules, I am exercising my conditional rights at this time," he smiled before our lips met once again in a passion filled kiss.
"Hey," I said quietly.
God, he looked good. He was coming right from practice, but that's when I thought he looked the best. Dressed casually with his hat on and no product in his hair. Don't get me wrong; I love a man who looks good in a suit, but casual was totally working for him.
"I wasn't sure if you were working today, but I'm glad you're not. We really need to talk."
I nodded silently and led him to the kitchen counter.
"Do you want some coffee?" I asked.
"No thanks."
I poured myself a third cup and leaned against the counter opposite him. I searched his eyes for some clue as to what he was going to say. They were blank. The light that normally inhabited those beautiful caramel coloured eyes was not there. I took a deep breath and tried to prepare myself for the inevitable conversation I knew was going to take place. I had already played it a thousand times in my head...'sorry Bekah, I like you and everything but I just don't think that it's going to work out for us; the age difference is just too big to overcome. We are at two different places in our lives and I am not ready for the responsibility of kids, hell I'm still a kid myself with my whole life ahead of me. I think it's best if we end things now. It was great to get to know you but have a nice life.'
Yep, this conversation had been taking place in my head since he left the other night.
"Beks - Sid " we said at the same time.
"You go first," I told him.
"No, you should go first," he insisted.
"What happened the other night?" I asked barely above a whisper, "why did you just leave like that?"
"I...I'm not...I don't really..."
"Jesus Christ Sid!"
"I'm sorry...this is just really difficult for me to say."
"Just say it. I know what's coming Sid so just say it."
"Beks, you have no idea what I'm going to say."
"Yes I do so spit it out for crying out loud!" I yelled not being able to contain the anger that was building inside me any longer.
"Calm down," Sid said getting up off his stool and coming towards me.
"Please don't come any closer and please don't tell me to calm down. Say it...just say it," I said barely holding back tears now.
Sid took a few more steps before he stopped. He was close enough that I could smell him but too far away to touch me.
"Why are you so upset? What is it you think I'm going to say?"
The tears were flowing and so were the words out of my mouth.
"Just be a man and tell me the truth!"
"And what would that be?" he asked calmly.
"That it's over! You don't want to be with me anymore, does that about cover it?"
He broke out into that high pitched girly laugh he had. Was he out of his mind? How was this funny?"
"I'm glad you think this is humorous."
"Beks," he said between gasps, "where in the world did you come up with that?"
Now I was just pissed. "Oh, I don't know, maybe because one minute I'm having an amazing kiss with my boyfriend and the next minute he practically runs out the door and I don't hear from him for two days! Yeah, why would I think it was over?"
He came towards me again, this time not letting the evil glare I was giving him stop him. He put his hands on my arms and looked deep into my eyes. "Baby, I love you. You are completely insane, but I love you. Nothing could be further from the truth."
"You don't want to break up?" I asked now very confused.
"No, I don't want to break up! I have put waaaaaaaaaay too much work into you to let you go now!"
"If that's supposed to be funny, I'm not laughing," I said holding back a smile.
"Yeah it is, and you want to smile," he said poking me in the sides and making me flinch.
"Stop it!" I said pushing his hands away. "If you're not breaking up with me, then what did you come here to talk about? Why did you leave the other night?"
He took a deep breath and pulled me in close to him. He nuzzled his face into my neck and his hot breath sent shivers through my entire body.
"I was scared," he said making no attempt to lift his head.
"Scared? Of what? Me?"
"You? No, baby I could never be scared of you," he chuckled finally raising his head only to rest his forehead against mine.
"Then what were you scared of?"
"Of where we were headed."
"I don't understand."
"We were getting very...let's say passionate, the other night and I was scared of what it was going to lead to."
"Sex?" I asked finally cluing in.
"Well...yeah," he said rather sheepishly.
"Are you saying that you don't want to have sex with me?" I goaded.
"NO! God no! That's not what I'm saying at all! Bekah you are incredibly beautiful and sexy and you excite me more than you could ever imagine...it's just...we said we were going to take things slow and then we were getting so close and..." he stopped.
"And what?" I asked tenderly touching his cheek.
He kissed the tip of my nose and looked down at the floor before he said "and...I've never been with anyone before."
A smile crept across my face as I processed what he had just said. I lifted his chin with my fingers so I could look into those gorgeous eyes of his.
"You've never been with anyone? Ever?"
"No, never."
"Ever?"
"N-E-V-E-R!" he stressed. "I was afraid to tell you because I didn't want to freak you out. I know you're still coming to terms with the whole age thing and I didn't think this information would really help."
I looked at him and smiled before wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing those beautiful, plump lips.
"Sidney Patrick Crosby, I love you. I-love-you!" I said smiling into another kiss.
"I love you too Beks," he said squeezing me into a tight hug and lifting my feet off the ground.
"So how is it that Mr. Hockey has never had sex?" I said now poking him in the sides.
"I was focused on playing hockey and...well, I've never been in love until now and that's important to me. I don't want to sleep with someone just for the sake of having sex. When I have sex for the first time I want it to be amazing and special and that means being in love."
I kissed him softly at first and then slowly and deeply and when we finally broke apart, our foreheads were once again resting against each other's.
"You never cease to amaze me Sidney," I whispered. "You are perfect aren't you?"
"Hardly! I am no where near perfect, but you...you make me a better man," he said. And with that, our lips met once again; this time not breaking apart for a long...long time.
"So now that that's settled," I started once we were both sitting at the counter, "let's just put everything out on the table."
"Okay."
"Sid, I love you and I think it's safe to say that we are stir up feelings inside the each other?"
"I'd say that's true."
"But clearly neither of us are ready to take our relationship to that level yet. We agreed to take thing slow and I think we should stick to it."
"I agree."
"So the ground rules remain the same. No spending the night when the kids are here, and since they are not going to know about us right away, that shouldn't be a problem. And as for sex, it's just not an option right now. Aside from this new information, I am no where near ready to take that step, so no more disappearing acts okay?"
"Deal, but I have one condition to add."
"And what's that?"
"I get to kiss you as much and as often as I like."
"As long as it fits into all other previously discussed rules."
"You drive a hard bargain Miss Jones, but I believe I can agree to those terms."
"Good."
"And since we are clearly in no violation of said rules, I am exercising my conditional rights at this time," he smiled before our lips met once again in a passion filled kiss.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Sidney's POV
I couldn't sleep. The look on Bekah's face when I left haunted me every time I closed my eyes. What was that look exactly? I'd never seen it before. Pain? Hurt? Anger? Disappointment? Disgust? I don't know, I couldn't place it. All I knew was that I was responsible for it and it was eating away at me.
What was she thinking? I knew I was walking on thin ice with her after everything that happened when I was away. Even though I had nothing to feel gulity for, it was not the ideal situation to put myself in. The whole thing with Shawna could have been disastrous for me, but I never once considered not telling Bekah. We've had so many ups and downs already, I had faith that we love each other enough to overcome almost anything - almost! Despite what she said, I knew she was upset that I left and didn't spend any of my precious time off with her. Was it any wonder she sought comfort in Max. Max for fuck sakes! She couldn't be friends with anyone else on the team? No, it had to be Max; the one guy I knew I couldn't trust! I'm sure he's just waiting for me to fuck up so he can pounce. Oh God! What if that's what I just did? What if I just pushed her towards him? I'm sure he'd be more than willing to finish what I couldn't. What if she thinks I didn't want to because I was hiding something? Stop it! Stop thinking like that!
I couldn't take it anymore. I had to do something. It was too early to go to the rink and I didn't want to wake anyone else in the house up. What I really wanted to do if I couldn't be at the rink was to be with Bekah; or at least feel close to her.
I remembered she gave me that movie of hers to watch if I got bored on my holiday. She said it probably wasn't up my alley but it was her favourite. I still had it in my bag and decided to give it a try.
She was right, it was so not my kind of thing, but it did make me feel close to her. I could totally picture her curled up on the couch in her flannels, under her big fuzzy blanket with a box of kleenex, crying at the scene in the bar when that dark haired bitch told Harley that Dusty was her husband. Yep, she would cry at that for sure! No one in this movie was going to win an Oscar, but the old guy did kind of crack me up. I was about to get up and turn it off when I heard familiar music.
I sat down and watched as Dusty sang that song Bekah loved to Harley. I remembered back to New Year's eve when I first heard that song. That was a night of many firsts. The first time Bekah and I danced together; the first time we slept in the same bed as more than friends; and the most important first of all...the first time she told me she loved me. It was the best feeling in the world! I was so happy that night; I'm still that happy. One thing I know for sure is I can't ever lose her.
I went to the rink early to skate and just shoot some pucks. It was only 7 am and I knew I had almost three hours before any of the other guys started rolling in. I was sitting in my stall when I heard the familiar french accent of my friend.
"Bonjour mon ami! Comment ça va?"
I just shook my head.
"Should I even ask how the reunion went?"
"Could have been better. Are you busy after practice?"
"I don't think so; Vero's still visiting her parents so no need to rush home."
"Can we grab some lunch or something? I really need to talk to you."
"Sure. Want to give me a hint what this is all about?"
"I'd rather save it for later when there's no one else around."
When we were back at Flower's I could finally open up about what was going on.
"So you didn't have the kind of reunion you were hoping for?" Marc asked.
"Not really."
"I thought everything was okay with you two after the Shawna thing?"
"It was; it is; it was. The problem has nothing to do with Shawna, it's all about me."
"What did you do?"
"It's not what I did, it's what I didn't do."
"What didn't you do?"
I looked at him with raised eyebrows and gave him that 'you know' look.
"What? I don't get it?"
"Neither did she," I said dryly.
"Oh. Ohhhhhhhh!" Marc said as the light bulb finally went off. "Why the hell not?"
"I couldn't."
"Again, why the hell not? Dude, she's hot and if she was willing to give it up...wait a second. You guys haven't done that yet?"
"No."
"Why the hell not?" Marc screeched like a girl.
"Because we agreed to take this slow. And there's the kids. I'm not even allowed to stay there when the kids are there."
"Ouch. So what happened?"
"It was great at first. I hung out with the boys for a bit and when Bekah and I were finally alone, it was great; totally headed in that direction and then...I froze."
"What do you mean you froze?"
"Heat of the moment, I stopped and said I had to go and I left."
"Why? Did the kids make you nervous?"
"No. I just couldn't."
"Okay, I'm not getting something here. Don't you want to have sex with her?"
"Hell yeah! And it's practically killing me not too but..."
"But what?"
"I don't want to disappoint her."
"Dude, you've got mad skills in everything, are you telling me you think you suck at sex?"
"I don't know, I've never..."
"You've never..."
"That's it. I've never."
"Holy shit! You're kidding with me right?" he laughed until I shot him a glare. "You're telling me that the Sidney Crosby has never had sex?"
"No, and I'd appreciate it if you would keep it between us."
"I'm really sorry to be repetitive but, why the hell not? It's not like millions of girls haven't thrown themselves at you. Take advantage my friend! Well maybe not now."
"I'm not like that. I'm not going to just have sex with anyone and everyone because I can. And I've never been in love before."
"Love? What has love got to do with with anything? You don't have to be in love with someone to have sex with them."
"I do; and that's pretty hypocritical coming from the guy who's been in love with the same girl since he was a baby! Are you saying that you could just screw any girl that offered herself to you?"
"Well no, because I'd never cheat on Vero, but you my friend, have the whole world being offered to you, and not to take advantage of some of the perks that come with it is just stupid!"
"Maybe it was before Bekah, but not now. I'm no different that you Flower. I'd never cheat on her. I love her way too much."
"Then what are you waiting for? You don't know how lucky you are to have your first time be with someone you're really in love with."
"I don't know. I guess I'm scared."
"Of what?"
"Everything. Sex completely changes a relationship. She has had a very traumatic past and it has been a very,very long time for her, I don't want to push her and freak her out."
"It doesn't sound like she'd be an unwilling participant."
"No, I don't think so, but that's huge pressure. She already has a hard time coping with our age difference, how am I supposed to tell her I've never been with anyone before. And what if we do make it that far and it's horrible and it ruins everything great we have?"
"I hate to tell you my friend, but everyone's first time is horrible, it just goes with the territory. That's why they say practice makes perfect. You weren't the best hockey player in the world the first time you put on a pair of skates right?"
"I guess. But she's had experience. What if she doesn't have patience for my...inexperience?"
"Dude, you have to stop second guessing yourself. You need to tell her the truth. I guarantee you it's not going to matter to her, she loves you. Besides, look at the positive, maybe she can teach you the ropes. Could be very interesting!"
"Maybe."
"Sid, you need to tell her before she starts to think there's something wrong. Call her."
"Thank you Marc. I knew you were the right person to talk to about this."
"Anytime. Can I make one suggestion though?"
"Sure."
"If she's horny, you might want to keep her away from Max," Marc grinned knowing full well the issues I had with Bekah being friends with him.
"Thanks alot Flower!"
"Hey, that's what I'm here for, now go call her."
I headed for the door and took my phone out of my pocket.
"Thanks Flower."
"You're welcome mon ami."
"And Flower?"
"No worries. Everything stays between us."
What was she thinking? I knew I was walking on thin ice with her after everything that happened when I was away. Even though I had nothing to feel gulity for, it was not the ideal situation to put myself in. The whole thing with Shawna could have been disastrous for me, but I never once considered not telling Bekah. We've had so many ups and downs already, I had faith that we love each other enough to overcome almost anything - almost! Despite what she said, I knew she was upset that I left and didn't spend any of my precious time off with her. Was it any wonder she sought comfort in Max. Max for fuck sakes! She couldn't be friends with anyone else on the team? No, it had to be Max; the one guy I knew I couldn't trust! I'm sure he's just waiting for me to fuck up so he can pounce. Oh God! What if that's what I just did? What if I just pushed her towards him? I'm sure he'd be more than willing to finish what I couldn't. What if she thinks I didn't want to because I was hiding something? Stop it! Stop thinking like that!
I couldn't take it anymore. I had to do something. It was too early to go to the rink and I didn't want to wake anyone else in the house up. What I really wanted to do if I couldn't be at the rink was to be with Bekah; or at least feel close to her.
I remembered she gave me that movie of hers to watch if I got bored on my holiday. She said it probably wasn't up my alley but it was her favourite. I still had it in my bag and decided to give it a try.
She was right, it was so not my kind of thing, but it did make me feel close to her. I could totally picture her curled up on the couch in her flannels, under her big fuzzy blanket with a box of kleenex, crying at the scene in the bar when that dark haired bitch told Harley that Dusty was her husband. Yep, she would cry at that for sure! No one in this movie was going to win an Oscar, but the old guy did kind of crack me up. I was about to get up and turn it off when I heard familiar music.
I sat down and watched as Dusty sang that song Bekah loved to Harley. I remembered back to New Year's eve when I first heard that song. That was a night of many firsts. The first time Bekah and I danced together; the first time we slept in the same bed as more than friends; and the most important first of all...the first time she told me she loved me. It was the best feeling in the world! I was so happy that night; I'm still that happy. One thing I know for sure is I can't ever lose her.
I went to the rink early to skate and just shoot some pucks. It was only 7 am and I knew I had almost three hours before any of the other guys started rolling in. I was sitting in my stall when I heard the familiar french accent of my friend.
"Bonjour mon ami! Comment ça va?"
I just shook my head.
"Should I even ask how the reunion went?"
"Could have been better. Are you busy after practice?"
"I don't think so; Vero's still visiting her parents so no need to rush home."
"Can we grab some lunch or something? I really need to talk to you."
"Sure. Want to give me a hint what this is all about?"
"I'd rather save it for later when there's no one else around."
When we were back at Flower's I could finally open up about what was going on.
"So you didn't have the kind of reunion you were hoping for?" Marc asked.
"Not really."
"I thought everything was okay with you two after the Shawna thing?"
"It was; it is; it was. The problem has nothing to do with Shawna, it's all about me."
"What did you do?"
"It's not what I did, it's what I didn't do."
"What didn't you do?"
I looked at him with raised eyebrows and gave him that 'you know' look.
"What? I don't get it?"
"Neither did she," I said dryly.
"Oh. Ohhhhhhhh!" Marc said as the light bulb finally went off. "Why the hell not?"
"I couldn't."
"Again, why the hell not? Dude, she's hot and if she was willing to give it up...wait a second. You guys haven't done that yet?"
"No."
"Why the hell not?" Marc screeched like a girl.
"Because we agreed to take this slow. And there's the kids. I'm not even allowed to stay there when the kids are there."
"Ouch. So what happened?"
"It was great at first. I hung out with the boys for a bit and when Bekah and I were finally alone, it was great; totally headed in that direction and then...I froze."
"What do you mean you froze?"
"Heat of the moment, I stopped and said I had to go and I left."
"Why? Did the kids make you nervous?"
"No. I just couldn't."
"Okay, I'm not getting something here. Don't you want to have sex with her?"
"Hell yeah! And it's practically killing me not too but..."
"But what?"
"I don't want to disappoint her."
"Dude, you've got mad skills in everything, are you telling me you think you suck at sex?"
"I don't know, I've never..."
"You've never..."
"That's it. I've never."
"Holy shit! You're kidding with me right?" he laughed until I shot him a glare. "You're telling me that the Sidney Crosby has never had sex?"
"No, and I'd appreciate it if you would keep it between us."
"I'm really sorry to be repetitive but, why the hell not? It's not like millions of girls haven't thrown themselves at you. Take advantage my friend! Well maybe not now."
"I'm not like that. I'm not going to just have sex with anyone and everyone because I can. And I've never been in love before."
"Love? What has love got to do with with anything? You don't have to be in love with someone to have sex with them."
"I do; and that's pretty hypocritical coming from the guy who's been in love with the same girl since he was a baby! Are you saying that you could just screw any girl that offered herself to you?"
"Well no, because I'd never cheat on Vero, but you my friend, have the whole world being offered to you, and not to take advantage of some of the perks that come with it is just stupid!"
"Maybe it was before Bekah, but not now. I'm no different that you Flower. I'd never cheat on her. I love her way too much."
"Then what are you waiting for? You don't know how lucky you are to have your first time be with someone you're really in love with."
"I don't know. I guess I'm scared."
"Of what?"
"Everything. Sex completely changes a relationship. She has had a very traumatic past and it has been a very,very long time for her, I don't want to push her and freak her out."
"It doesn't sound like she'd be an unwilling participant."
"No, I don't think so, but that's huge pressure. She already has a hard time coping with our age difference, how am I supposed to tell her I've never been with anyone before. And what if we do make it that far and it's horrible and it ruins everything great we have?"
"I hate to tell you my friend, but everyone's first time is horrible, it just goes with the territory. That's why they say practice makes perfect. You weren't the best hockey player in the world the first time you put on a pair of skates right?"
"I guess. But she's had experience. What if she doesn't have patience for my...inexperience?"
"Dude, you have to stop second guessing yourself. You need to tell her the truth. I guarantee you it's not going to matter to her, she loves you. Besides, look at the positive, maybe she can teach you the ropes. Could be very interesting!"
"Maybe."
"Sid, you need to tell her before she starts to think there's something wrong. Call her."
"Thank you Marc. I knew you were the right person to talk to about this."
"Anytime. Can I make one suggestion though?"
"Sure."
"If she's horny, you might want to keep her away from Max," Marc grinned knowing full well the issues I had with Bekah being friends with him.
"Thanks alot Flower!"
"Hey, that's what I'm here for, now go call her."
I headed for the door and took my phone out of my pocket.
"Thanks Flower."
"You're welcome mon ami."
"And Flower?"
"No worries. Everything stays between us."
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Chapter 85
"Golden boy better have had one hell of an excuse," Max said as I came back into the room.
"Don't start Max, I really am not in the mood for a Sid bashing session."
"A little touchy eh? My guess is then it wasn't a good excuse."
"Depends if a natural disaster is a good excuse."
"Explain."
"Apparently there was a massive snowstorm that covered that whole part of Québec. Houses were buried, there's been no hydro, no phone service and they had to call in the reserves to dig people out. Sid hasn't even made it home yet, he's headed there now."
"A snow storm that big, how come we didn't hear about it?"
"Probably because we've been sequestered in an arena all weekend and we were listening to cd's all the way home, not the radio."
"So why don't you look satisfied with this explanation?"
"I don't want to fight with you Max, so let's just say I am less than impressed about some of the company he had and leave it at that."
"I'm guessing that company was of the female persuasion?"
"Mmm hmm," I mumbled as I laid my head back on the couch and closed my eyes trying not to picture that skank's lips on my boyfriend.
I trusted Sid, I really did. I also knew that girls throwing themselves at him came with the territory, but no matter how many times you tell yourself that, you never know how you're going to feel until something happens.
"Before you say anything Max, he told me everything that happened this week, which I am not going to go into details about, and I believe what he said and we're moving on; end of story."
"Did he...did he actually have the balls to...?"
"He didn't screw around if that's what you're getting at; now can we please change the subject?"
"Fine. Did you tell him about this weekend?" Max asked.
"Yes."
"And?"
"And it's fine."
"He must have done something really bad if he didn't give you a hard time about spending the weekend with me."
"First of all, it's not like we were on some romantic getaway by ourselves all weekend, we were at a kids hockey tournament for crying out loud. Second of all, he didn't do anything. He wasn't exactly happy, but I told him that you and I were becoming close friends and he needed to accept it or we were going to have a problem."
"You stuck up for me; for us?"
"I meant what I said. I feel a deep connection with you Max; I don't know why and I can't really explain it. But what we have is special and I'm not going to choose between the two of you, so you both are going to have to accept it and learn how to co-exist in my life together. Can you handle that?"
"If he can handle it, so can I."
"It's not a competition Max."
"Everything is a competition," he smirked.
When I opened the door, I saw those beautiful caramel eyes that I'd been missing so much staring back at me.
"Welcome back," I said wrapping my arms around his neck.
Sid returned my embrace, lifting me off the ground in the process.
"It's sooo good to be back," he said burying his face in my neck after sending shivers through my entire body by kissing the sweet spot right in the crook.
"Am I too late to see the boys?"
"You just made it. They're getting ready for bed."
"Is it okay if I go back and surprise them?"
"Yes, just try not to get them too wound up okay?"
"Yes dear," he said giving me a quick peck on the cheek.
The squeals of delight was confirmation Sid had succeeded in surprising them. I heard the hooting and hollering and decided to wander back and see what was going on. I watched from the doorway. Sidney was sitting on Alex's bed and Jake was kneeling down, leaning over his back with his arms around Sid's neck resting his chin on his shoulder. Sid was holding Jake's hands in front of him and watching intently as Alex acted out every goal he scored at the tournament. When he was done, Alex collapsed on the bed next to Sid.
"Well it sounds like you had an awesome time. I'm proud of you bud," Sid said ruffling Alex's hair. "You had some pretty sweet moves going on, do you mind if I use some of them?"
"Naw, that's cool," Alex said nonchalantly climbing under his covers.
Jake left to get in his own bed and when Sid got up to leave, Alex spoke up.
"Sid?"
"Yeah bud?"
"I have a confession. I really wanted you to show me some moves but..." he stopped and looked down at his hands.
"But what?"
"But...you weren't here so... I asked Max," he said almost like he was embarrassed. "I hope you're not mad at me."
"Ah bud, of course I'm not mad at you. I was hoping that you weren't mad at me for not being there."
"Naw, I was kinda sad at first but Mom told me that you had to go see your mom because now that you live so far away and because you work so much you never get to see your mom and you miss her and this was the only time you could go see her."
A warm smile appeared across those luscious lips. "Your mom's right. I don't get to see my family very often so I have to go when I get the chance."
"I'd be pretty sad too if I didn't get to see my mom everyday."
"Me too."
"Sid?"
"Yeah?"
"Max is really cool and everything, but would you mind showing me some of your moves sometime?"
"I wouldn't mind at all. We'll do it soon okay?"
"Awesome! You're the best!" Alex said giving Sid a big hug.
Sid went and tucked Jake in too before joining me on the couch. He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him.
"Those boys really are amazing you know that?" he asked kissing the top of my head.
"I know, I'm very lucky."
"I don't think luck has anything to do with it. They are who they are because of you. You are incredible you know that?"
"No."
"Well maybe I can show you how incredible I think you are," he whispered bringing his lips towards mine.
Just as he was about to make contact, I stopped him.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Did you scrub those lips after that puck slut touched them?"
"I thought we were past that," he said with a serious look of distress on his face.
I couldn't really stop the smile from spreading across my face.
Sid rolled his eyes. "Nice Bekah, you sure know how to ruin a moment."
"But you love me anyways," I laughed.
"I do," he said taking my face in his hands. "I love you so much Bekah. More than I ever thought possible. I don't ever want to lose you," he whispered.
"Then you better kiss me," I whispered back.
"I think I can handle that!"
Our lips touched; gently at first and then progressing to the animal hunger we were both feeling. The passion running through my veins was screaming at me to rip the clothes from his body and explore every inch of him. His hands wandered over my body, leaving tingles everywhere they touched. Just when I felt like I was about to explode, he stopped and rested his forehead against mine. He was breathing heavily, and his voice was quiverring when he said, "I have to go."
"Don't start Max, I really am not in the mood for a Sid bashing session."
"A little touchy eh? My guess is then it wasn't a good excuse."
"Depends if a natural disaster is a good excuse."
"Explain."
"Apparently there was a massive snowstorm that covered that whole part of Québec. Houses were buried, there's been no hydro, no phone service and they had to call in the reserves to dig people out. Sid hasn't even made it home yet, he's headed there now."
"A snow storm that big, how come we didn't hear about it?"
"Probably because we've been sequestered in an arena all weekend and we were listening to cd's all the way home, not the radio."
"So why don't you look satisfied with this explanation?"
"I don't want to fight with you Max, so let's just say I am less than impressed about some of the company he had and leave it at that."
"I'm guessing that company was of the female persuasion?"
"Mmm hmm," I mumbled as I laid my head back on the couch and closed my eyes trying not to picture that skank's lips on my boyfriend.
I trusted Sid, I really did. I also knew that girls throwing themselves at him came with the territory, but no matter how many times you tell yourself that, you never know how you're going to feel until something happens.
"Before you say anything Max, he told me everything that happened this week, which I am not going to go into details about, and I believe what he said and we're moving on; end of story."
"Did he...did he actually have the balls to...?"
"He didn't screw around if that's what you're getting at; now can we please change the subject?"
"Fine. Did you tell him about this weekend?" Max asked.
"Yes."
"And?"
"And it's fine."
"He must have done something really bad if he didn't give you a hard time about spending the weekend with me."
"First of all, it's not like we were on some romantic getaway by ourselves all weekend, we were at a kids hockey tournament for crying out loud. Second of all, he didn't do anything. He wasn't exactly happy, but I told him that you and I were becoming close friends and he needed to accept it or we were going to have a problem."
"You stuck up for me; for us?"
"I meant what I said. I feel a deep connection with you Max; I don't know why and I can't really explain it. But what we have is special and I'm not going to choose between the two of you, so you both are going to have to accept it and learn how to co-exist in my life together. Can you handle that?"
"If he can handle it, so can I."
"It's not a competition Max."
"Everything is a competition," he smirked.
When I opened the door, I saw those beautiful caramel eyes that I'd been missing so much staring back at me.
"Welcome back," I said wrapping my arms around his neck.
Sid returned my embrace, lifting me off the ground in the process.
"It's sooo good to be back," he said burying his face in my neck after sending shivers through my entire body by kissing the sweet spot right in the crook.
"Am I too late to see the boys?"
"You just made it. They're getting ready for bed."
"Is it okay if I go back and surprise them?"
"Yes, just try not to get them too wound up okay?"
"Yes dear," he said giving me a quick peck on the cheek.
The squeals of delight was confirmation Sid had succeeded in surprising them. I heard the hooting and hollering and decided to wander back and see what was going on. I watched from the doorway. Sidney was sitting on Alex's bed and Jake was kneeling down, leaning over his back with his arms around Sid's neck resting his chin on his shoulder. Sid was holding Jake's hands in front of him and watching intently as Alex acted out every goal he scored at the tournament. When he was done, Alex collapsed on the bed next to Sid.
"Well it sounds like you had an awesome time. I'm proud of you bud," Sid said ruffling Alex's hair. "You had some pretty sweet moves going on, do you mind if I use some of them?"
"Naw, that's cool," Alex said nonchalantly climbing under his covers.
Jake left to get in his own bed and when Sid got up to leave, Alex spoke up.
"Sid?"
"Yeah bud?"
"I have a confession. I really wanted you to show me some moves but..." he stopped and looked down at his hands.
"But what?"
"But...you weren't here so... I asked Max," he said almost like he was embarrassed. "I hope you're not mad at me."
"Ah bud, of course I'm not mad at you. I was hoping that you weren't mad at me for not being there."
"Naw, I was kinda sad at first but Mom told me that you had to go see your mom because now that you live so far away and because you work so much you never get to see your mom and you miss her and this was the only time you could go see her."
A warm smile appeared across those luscious lips. "Your mom's right. I don't get to see my family very often so I have to go when I get the chance."
"I'd be pretty sad too if I didn't get to see my mom everyday."
"Me too."
"Sid?"
"Yeah?"
"Max is really cool and everything, but would you mind showing me some of your moves sometime?"
"I wouldn't mind at all. We'll do it soon okay?"
"Awesome! You're the best!" Alex said giving Sid a big hug.
Sid went and tucked Jake in too before joining me on the couch. He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him.
"Those boys really are amazing you know that?" he asked kissing the top of my head.
"I know, I'm very lucky."
"I don't think luck has anything to do with it. They are who they are because of you. You are incredible you know that?"
"No."
"Well maybe I can show you how incredible I think you are," he whispered bringing his lips towards mine.
Just as he was about to make contact, I stopped him.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Did you scrub those lips after that puck slut touched them?"
"I thought we were past that," he said with a serious look of distress on his face.
I couldn't really stop the smile from spreading across my face.
Sid rolled his eyes. "Nice Bekah, you sure know how to ruin a moment."
"But you love me anyways," I laughed.
"I do," he said taking my face in his hands. "I love you so much Bekah. More than I ever thought possible. I don't ever want to lose you," he whispered.
"Then you better kiss me," I whispered back.
"I think I can handle that!"
Our lips touched; gently at first and then progressing to the animal hunger we were both feeling. The passion running through my veins was screaming at me to rip the clothes from his body and explore every inch of him. His hands wandered over my body, leaving tingles everywhere they touched. Just when I felt like I was about to explode, he stopped and rested his forehead against mine. He was breathing heavily, and his voice was quiverring when he said, "I have to go."
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