Chapter 102

-----------Sidney's POV-------------

I couldn't sleep.

I don't understand what's happening to me right now. I'm laying in my own bed, in my own house, with the most beautiful angel in my arms and I am so overcome with emotion I don't know what to do or how to deal with it. I was not a emotional person; hell I am notorious for being unemotional - almost "robotic", but right here, right now, my feelings were so overwhelming I had to let them out.

I slid out of bed carefully so I didn't wake Bekah up. God she was beautiful! I could just watch her sleep all night; the way her hair fell on the pillow framing her face; the way her lips slightly parted and pursed outward like she was pouting; the way she wrinkled her nose when she was dreaming; the content little sigh she let out whenever she moved or rolled over. God damn I am so in love with her!

I made my way into the bathroom and shut the door, put my hands on the counter and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I was shocked by what was staring back at me. It was no longer the reflection of a kid obsessed with hockey and making his parents happy; or the guy who had the weight of the entire hockey world on his shoulders; or the media darling who could never say no to an interview. No, looking back at me tonight was a man. A man who for the first time in his life had something other than hockey to think about. A man so unbelievably happy and so in love with the woman asleep in his bed that he didn't know how to cope.

I lowered my head and began to sob uncontrollably. I tried to stop but I couldn't. Men don't cry! What the fuck is going on with me? The warm, soft hands around my waist scared the hell out of me.

"Sidney, what's wrong?" she asked with a hint of concern in her voice.

"Nothing," I replied standing up quickly forcing her to let go of me, but she came right back and put her arms around me. We were now looking at each other in the mirror but not saying a word. She kissed me softly across my bare back sending an electric sensation through my entire body, yet I still could not stop crying. Bekah moved out from behind me and leaned against the counter facing me. We didn't speak, she just rubbed her hand up and down my arm soothingly.

It seemed like an eternity until I was able to pull myself together. When I finally looked at her I noticed she was wearing nothing but one of my Pens t-shirts and it was no time before it was evident how much I liked what I was seeing. I moved so I was standing in front of her, lifted her up and stood between her legs. As I stood there, staring into her eyes, I could only think one thing...'I have to have her now!'

My mouth enveloped hers and I kissed her like my life depended on it. I ripped that shirt off over her head and let myself begin to ravage her.

"Sidney," she said breathlessly.

"Hmmm," I managed between nibbles.

"Tell me what you want," she whispered.

"I want you."

"No, tell me what you want," she demanded.

'This is it,' I thought. 'We did it right the first time, now the gloves are off. I have so much pent up emotion I need to let out.'

I kissed my way from her shoulder up her neck to her ear. I took her earlobe in my mouth. Ever so slowly I whispered, "I want to fuck you."

"Mmmm," she purred. "Then do it."

I pulled her to the edge of the counter and in one swift movement rammed my aching erection inside her.

I was laying with my head on her stomach enjoying the feeling of her fingers running through my hair. We were still naked and the sun was starting to come up over the lake.

"Sidney?"

"Mmhhmm?"

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"About what?"

"Earlier?" she asked timidly.

"Oh. I just...I was overwhelmed with so many different emotions and I didn't really know what to do with that ya know? I'm just not used to loving anything but hockey and now..."

"And now what?"

"And now I have you and the boys. Beks, for the first time in my entire life, hockey isn't the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning, it's you. I used to get lost in my own little world, usually thinking about how I can improve my shot or what I could have done better in the game the night before or who I have to go sit through another painful interview with. Now I'm wondering what you're doing, how many goals Alex scored in the game that I had to miss, what video game Jake is going to want me to play with him that night, how many babies you had to comfort while they got treatment, what we're going to have for dinner, what you're wearing! I just never loved anything more than hockey before."

"What are you saying Sidney?"

"I'm saying that the day I met you, my life changed forever. The first time you told me you loved me, I thought it couldn't get any better, but I was wrong. Making love to you last night was the best night of my life and giving ourselves to each other so completely only reassured me of one thing."

"And what would that be Crosby?"

"This is what I want my life to be. This is how I want to spend the rest of my life. With you."